Ezra is twelve!

TWELVE TODAY

Me: What is your dream birthday, Ezra?

Ezra: I don't know.

Me: Do you like your birthday?

Ezra: I guess. I'm just getting older. 

Haha

I asked him if he told anyone at school that today was his birthday, and he had told one friend. 😂 I asked him where he wanted to eat for his birthday, and he wanted to check with Sophia and Amos first to see what they like. 😍

Oh man oh man, I LOVE this kid. I don't have to worry about him. He gets up when he's supposed to, showers without me telling him. He likes to look sharp and smell good. :) He has a big, protective, tender heart that only a few get to see. He's funny and athletic. He wants to do the right thing. I am so grateful God blessed me with this boy. I pray that he always follows Him. Biggest fan right here! 🙋💙

I ask my kids these same birthday questions every year on their exact birthday.  No prompting.  Here are Sophia's responses on her 15th birthday. :-)

1.  What is something Mommy always says to you?  Mommy? Okay. Ummm, I love          you, I guess.

2.  What makes Mommy happy?  When we say, "You're the best."

3.  What makes Mommy sad?  When we don't give you hugs.

4.  How does Mommy make you laugh?  You say dumb jokes, except like they're funny.

5.  What was Mommy like as a child?  (Laughs) Are we supposed to know that?  She            liked doing jump roping and cheerleading.

6.  How old is Mommy?  41

7.  How tall is Mommy?  5'5...imagine the next question is 'What does Mommy weigh?' Lol

8.  What is Mommy's favorite thing to do? Hang out with us.

9.  What does Mommy do when you're not around?  Hang out with friends and edit.

10.  If Mommy becomes famous, what will it be for? Photography

11.  What is Mommy really good at?  Making people feel good.

12.  What is Mommy not very good at?  (Laughs) Being a bad mom.

13.  What does Mommy do for her job? Works at the church and photography

14.  What is Mommy's favorite food?  Steak, for sure.

15.  What makes you proud of Mommy?  When you stack that paper with your photography. :)

16.  If Mommy were a cartoon character, who would she be?  The Pretty Princess

17.  What do you and Mommy do together? Watch shows

18.  How are you and Mommy the same? Tastebuds. 

19.  How are you and Mommy different?  Opposite personality...you're a peacemaker, I'm a go-getter.

20.  How do you know Mommy loves you? You tell me like every day.

21.  Where is Mommy's favorite place to go?  I will say Provinos.

22.  What makes you happy?  Soccer; sports.

23.  What makes you sad?  Getting a bad grade

24.  What makes you laugh? When people tell jokes.

25.  What is your favorite thing to do? Probably play sports

26.  What is your favorite food and drink?  Food- pizza; Drink- Dr. Pepper

27.  What is your favorite color?  Black

28.  Where is your favorite place to go?  Soccer fields

29.  What are your favorite movies or TV shows?  TV Show- Cobra Kai; Movie- Marvel movies

30.  What is your favorite book?  Diary of a Wimpy Kid

Daniel Ray Kirk

I write this from my heart in honor of my brother, Daniel Ray Kirk. I love this man. One of my very favorite people in this world. Let me tell you about him. He was truly one of the nicest people you could ever meet. He would flash that white, friendly smile to people. So gentle and so kind. He was a delivery driver for UPS. The people on his route loved him! Bringing him treats. I would be on the phone with him through his AirPods and hear him greeting people and them talking back. So friendly. He was a hard worker. Working for UPS is no joke! He excelled at it.

 He was a family man. His girls were the delight of his heart. He was a very nurturing dad as they were little...tending to them and the needs in the home.  As they grew, he loved buying them presents every time he got to see them. He took photos of them and did fun things with them. He adored them, and they adored him back. He loved his family (Mom, Dad, me) and spending time together...holidays, birthdays, vacations, special weekends.  It felt the best when we were all together. He was really a big kid at heart. My kids love Uncle Daniel. He was fun! He gave the best fireworks productions and spared no expense in doing so. He loved working on his car.  He kept it spotless. He loved music and singing. He loved the worship music at our church. He was a giver. Walking downtown, he was that guy to put money in people's guitars or donation boxes. Last year, he gave me his Apple Watch. He just wanted me to have it. He loved buying presents for people and doing surprises. He always let me hold him really long. We are both huggers. He's one of the very few people in the world that I could hug and hold for a very long time. It wasn't awkward. We were comfortable with each other and comforted each other. Occasionally, I'd sneak in a kiss on the cheek, and he would react as any brother and say, "Ugh!"  Lol.  

He fought loooong and so, so hard. It's been a journey. Over the last 5-6 years, I have had a front row seat to depression and alcohol addiction, ever so sneakily creeping in. It's hard to know which came first. He said, "You think you're okay and in control, but eventually you're not." Mental. Illness. Is. Real. Daniel would want you to know that. Just because you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean that it's not. I've never had a heart attack, but surely I can imagine how scary and painful that must be! Daniel would want to encourage everyone to have compassion and empathy towards others because you never know what they are dealing with. He certainly lived by this. Even in the midst of some of his most despairing times, he would say, "I really want to help others...I don't want anyone to be in the place that I am." I have seen him help others through the years. God delivered Daniel from alcohol addiction for a whole year, but the depression, physical ailments, and life circumstances still felt unbearable for him. 

Let me tell you something I witnessed most recently. Over the last several months, God did an amazing work in Daniel's heart, like nothing I had ever seen. He was devouring Scripture, listening to sermons and worship songs. He couldn't get enough. He joked that he had read more of the Bible in those months than he had in his lifetime combined.  (And we grew up in church and Christian school!)  He couldn't wait to share what the Lord was teaching him. I've never personally witnessed someone this eager to know God! It was amazing. And I can't tell you how many praise sessions I had alone in my house or car, raising my hands and saying aloud, "Praise the Lord!" and just weeping with joy at what God was doing in Daniel's life. God reminded me this morning that He answered my prayer on this earth!! I witnessed a miracle. Daniel knew, and oh how he KNOWS Jesus. He would REALLY want you to know Him too. 

His story did not end as I thought it would. Even as recently as this past Thursday...after going through something hard, he said, "Maybe this can be added to my testimony!" I cannot and will not pretend that the hurt and pain I'm feeling isn't horrible. I miss him already. I would give anything for one of those really long hugs. But I DO NOT grieve without hope. My pastor's wife, who is also one of my dearest friends, said, "Angela! He's not depressed anymore! He didn't wake up with anxiety today! He is so whole and feels so loved and joyful right now." And to that all I can say is, "Praise the Lord."  

Daniel wished to raise awareness of mental health issues. Life is precious. Reach out if you are hurting. Reach out to me! Dial 988 to talk to a professional at any time! You are NOT alone. God wants to help you in this lifetime. If you are alive, you are here for a reason. There is HOPE. You might not see it, but you must believe it. "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."  John 10:10

In helping to raise mental health awareness, if you have a close friend or family member struggling...don't' give up! Keep loving them. We tried all the things, but a professional told me that letting them know they are loved is about all you can do. And we did that. To the very end. Be kind to people and show compassion. Jesus wept when He saw His friends weeping. The Bible says love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  

Daniel, I'm going to miss you so much. I already do. You're a good man. I'm so proud of you. I will see you soon.

Love,

(As he would call me) "Big Sis" 

Amos is EIGHT

Amos, who is NOT typically an early riser, burst into my room this morning at 6:58 a.m. and said, "I'M EIGHT TODAY!" Lol. I love his enthusiasm for life, which is probably mostly revealed to the people he knows the most. He was convinced that Lily, our dog, knew that today was his birthday by the way she was wagging her tail. 😍 This morning I showed him this picture below of him as a newborn, and on his own he re-enacted it. 😁 I LOVE this kid. I never want to forget how he skips into school. The world is a better place with Amos Cole in it. Happy 8th Birthday to him!

Every year, I ask my kids these same questions on their exact birthday. These are Amos' answers on his 8th birthday.

1. What is something Mommy always says to you?  I love you.

2.  What makes Mommy happy?  When I hug you.

3.  What makes Mommy sad?  I guess when someone dies.

4.  How does Mommy make you laugh?  You don't.  Me: That is not true!  You laugh at Mommy probably every single day.  Amos: starts to giggle, giggle.  Me: Isn't that true?  Amos: It's true. (laughs)

5.  What was Mommy like as a child?  How am I supposed to know that?? Ummm, you had no Wi-Fi.

6.  How old is Mommy?  41, let's go!

7.  How tall is Mommy?  I would say something around like 5 foot 6.

8.  What is Mommy's favorite thing to do?  Go to church.  Wait, no no no...it's vacation.

9.  What does Mommy do when you're not around?  Take photos.

10.  If Mommy becomes famous, what will it be for? For her photography.  I mean that's really the only option.  It's not like you're going to play in the NBA or NFL.

11.  What is Mommy really good at?  Driving.  

12.  What is Mommy not very good at?  She would definitely not be good at the NFL.  It's pretty much true.  I think you would be better at NBA than NFL because NFL is just non-stop.

13.  What does Mommy do for her job?  Take photos

14.  What is Mommy's favorite food?  I have no clue.  Can you tell me the answer?

15.  What makes you proud of Mommy? Photography

16.  If Mommy were a cartoon character, who would she be?  Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel

17.  What do you and Mommy do together?  Cuddle

18.  How are you and Mommy the same?  We both cuddle Lily and give her belly rubs.

19.  How are you and Mommy different?  Hair.  Yours is long, and mine is short. 

20.  How do you know Mommy loves you?  Because you hug me every day.

21.  Where is Mommy's favorite place to go?  Destin, Florida.  That's the best place I can think of.

22.  What makes you happy?  Getting "Leader for Life" at school.

23.  What makes you sad?  When I lose a match against Ezra in something. If I had to guess Ezra's height, I would say 4 foot 4. (So random, haha)

24.  What makes you laugh?  When other people laugh, and I think it's funny.

25.  What is your favorite thing to do?  I don't know if you're going to like this one, but I might have to go with video games.

26.  What is your favorite food and drink?  Food- pizza; Drink- Dr. Pepper

27.  What is your favorite color?  I think I'd have to go with gold. 

28.  Where is your favorite place to go?  If I could go anywhere, I'd like to go to California to meet Steph Curry.  And if I can't meet him, Id want to meet Lebron James.  Or Dwayne Wade. Or Dremond Green.  Or Damian Lillard. Or Shaquille ONeal.

29.  What are your favorite movies or TV shows?  TV shows- Larva Movie- Avengers End Game

30.  What is your favorite book?  the Llama Llama books

Summer 2022 Vacay

Our Destin Beach vacation was a blast! We started the day at Ezra's promotion from 5th grade and ended the day at the beach!  

The kids actually did great road-trippin. They are great travelers.

This was my passenger sidekick. We loved competing in finding as many state license plates as we could. It was actually one of my favorite parts of the trip! Sophia ended up finding more states than I did, but I did find Alaska! 😃 We found a total of 38 states. Thanks to Silverdale Kids for the game idea in our road trip packet!

This picture just says "summer" to me. 😊

So looking ahead at the weather....things weren't looking too good. Since the day we traveled was such nice weather, we decided to drive STRAIGHT to the beach. There was only about an hour left of daylight, and we wanted to make sure we got at least an hour of beach time on our beach trip!😜

We got right into the water- clothes and all!

Well, at least most of us did. 😉

This is more of Sophia's vibe. 

She be chillin. 💛

We were happy to be here.

That night we took advantage of some indoor swim time and jacuzzi time. Jacuzzis = always one of my favorite parts of every vacation. Thankfully, my kids enjoy them too. I'm thinking I definitely need to own one of these some day. 😊

True to the weather report, the whole next morning looked like this. 😞 Stormy and rainy. Our power even went out at the hotel for a few minutes. What's really cool about kids though is that they usually adapt pretty well. The boys made friends in the pool and played water football for hours. I was the one pouting on the side wishing for my beach day. 😂

The weather did clear up enough that afternoon to go outside, so we visited the Harbor Walk Village.  

They had all kinds of cool boats, restaurants, and shops.  

This part of the harbor walk totally fit Sophia. 💛

Amos said one of his favorite parts of the trip was eating at this restaurant, East Pass Seafood and Oyster House. He ate pizza. Haha.

Sophia was so excited about the little henna art she got on her arm.

That night, Amos and I were the only ones to venture out to the beach for a little bit. It was cloudy and windy, but still beautiful.

We passed a lot of football on this trip.

The beach we went to on this evening was across the water from the Harbor we were at earlier in the day.  The harbor view was beautiful that night.

The next morning's weather was just like the day before but worse. 😟 We were even under tornado watch. The boys were totally fine to play in the pool all morning again. I just read a book, and Sophia chilled in the room. Thankfully, the sun finally came out that evening. We decided to visit the Okaloosa Island Pier. This evening was definitely a highlight for me. Probably because the sun finally came out. It was so peaceful and beautiful on the pier. Many people were fishing. We even saw several dolphins jumping and playing in the water. The evening felt kinda magical to me.

The next day- the day we were supposed to be leaving- was perfect weather, so I inquired about staying an extra day. We needed at least one full beach day! It did not disappoint. The blue water, white sand. Sooo nice. 😍

That evening, my aunt and uncle treated us to dinner at Fudpuckers. So sweet! They happened to be at Destin at the same time as us just staying one mile down the road. It was great to see them! At Fudpuckers, we got to hold a baby alligator. The whole experience was a lot of fun!

After dinner, we got ready to take some pictures on the beach. My dreamy heart has always wanted to have family beach pictures. My aunt took some photos for us, and I took some for them. The wind was CRAZY as you can tell from the pictures. (We really did brush our hair. Lol.) It was truly a beautiful evening though.

I didn't pose like this. I was just trying to tame my wildly blowing hair. It's the best one I got. Lol. 

My Aunt Jeanie and I

The next day was another beautiful day. We wanted to stay at the beach as long as possible before driving home. We got a few good hours in. The water was actually the calmest and most beautiful on this day. We all went out into the water pretty far. Sophia wanted to beat the farthest person out. 😁 Amos came with us, but stayed in a raft held tightly by Momma. 😊 We had a lot of fun with the waves.

He's a joyful little dude. 💓 He would have stayed at the beach if he could.  He very sincerely asked me later why we couldn't just stay. Lol.

It was time to go home. Not long after driving away the kids said, "Mom, that was so much fun! We had a blast." All on their own. And that's all my Momma heart wanted to hear. 💛

 I asked each of them their favorite parts of the trip:

Sophia- the afternoon at the Harbor and taking photos at the beach *correction- Sophia said that she forgot about Fudpuckers and that was definitely her favorite: holding the alligator, being in the fun environment, the decor, the food, all the signatures everywhere.

Ezra- seeing the alligators and holding an alligator at Fudpuckers

Amos- the food 😂 Eating at East Pass and Fudpuckers. And seeing the alligators. 

That's a wrap! Thankful for this sweet time with my little family. Just making memories. 

 These are still the days.  💞